Our little Shrimp

I think everyone knows by now. On Monday I went to the ER in Columbia Falls and they told me the unfortunate news that my baby stopped growing. I refused a D&C hoping, hoping, hoping that there was a mistake, but Dr. Lien confirmed today that our baby has no heartbeat. She was very encouraging even though she told us the worst news I could ever hear.

Thank you, everyone, for the prayers, and please keep them coming because we’re still going through a hard time. I always said how awful it must be to out live your children.. I guess I know how it feels now. I may not have had the privilege of holding my baby like I longed to, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t know and love my baby with all of my heart.

Paul and I didn’t plan on this baby, but after we found out we were expecting we couldn’t help but be excited and count down the days till we got to hold our child. It’s really unfair. But God knows better than we do.

A good friend of mine sent this to me, and even though it makes me cry whenever I read it, I need to..

Jesus Has a Rocking Chair
Many hopeful moms and dads Try to have a child of their own Some will never get the chance Others do and see them grown And there are those who are expecting That precious baby soon But then it's gone before it ever leaves The safety of it's mamma's womb Jesus has a rocking chair And He holds that precious baby With oh, such tender care He takes the place of mom and dad He's the greatest parent a child could have Don't worry about the children there Jesus has a rocking chair
I’m not ready to talk to people, but I do appreciate the messages left for me whether it’s a text, facebook or myspace. My mom is coming tomorrow and will be with me for a week. I look forward to seeing her- I just wish it was under certain circumstances. Just keep me in your prayers.