I know this is a day early, but I plan on doing a lot of cleaning tomorrow so I don’t know if I’ll have a chance to come over tomorrow.
Yesterday Paul had two different people come up to him at school asking about the baby and I. Paul wanted so bad to tell them how great things were going, how big I was getting, how the baby was moving like crazy.. but he couldn’t say any of those things. Instead he had to let them know that I miscarried. Gotta love those awkward moments!
Since the miscarriage we have had our ups and downs. God has been there every step of the way, but it’s still hard to think about. I should be 30 weeks and 4 days by now.. I should be decorating a baby room in pinks and browns (because I knew I was having a girl).. Sometimes I still have nightmares about being in the emergency room and the doctor telling me that I was in the progress of aborting my own baby.
God doesn’t put more on us that we can handle. Paul and I had no idea that we could “handle” this. But through this we have grown even stronger in our relationship with each other, and I’m still growing in God.
Every month I hope and pray that it will be OUR month, but so far it hasn’t happened. God knows I’ve cried, yelled, and cried some more. But I’m tired of that- really this time. Paul and I are moving on.. getting our priorities straight.
We’re paying attention to our responsibilities at church, work, getting our bodies looking hot, and enjoying our life right now. We know that God is going to bless us with a large family.. it’s just not time yet.
For all those mommies out there that have miscarried- you are not alone! Our month to get it all off our chest and let it all out..
Yesterday Paul had two different people come up to him at school asking about the baby and I. Paul wanted so bad to tell them how great things were going, how big I was getting, how the baby was moving like crazy.. but he couldn’t say any of those things. Instead he had to let them know that I miscarried. Gotta love those awkward moments!
Since the miscarriage we have had our ups and downs. God has been there every step of the way, but it’s still hard to think about. I should be 30 weeks and 4 days by now.. I should be decorating a baby room in pinks and browns (because I knew I was having a girl).. Sometimes I still have nightmares about being in the emergency room and the doctor telling me that I was in the progress of aborting my own baby.
God doesn’t put more on us that we can handle. Paul and I had no idea that we could “handle” this. But through this we have grown even stronger in our relationship with each other, and I’m still growing in God.
Every month I hope and pray that it will be OUR month, but so far it hasn’t happened. God knows I’ve cried, yelled, and cried some more. But I’m tired of that- really this time. Paul and I are moving on.. getting our priorities straight.
We’re paying attention to our responsibilities at church, work, getting our bodies looking hot, and enjoying our life right now. We know that God is going to bless us with a large family.. it’s just not time yet.
For all those mommies out there that have miscarried- you are not alone! Our month to get it all off our chest and let it all out..
2 people shared some ♥♥♥:
We may not be alone, but it sure feels like it when you are going through it. I'm glad that God is getting you both through this. The hard days do get farther apart and each day gets easier to get through. God truly is our strength in time of weakness and our comfort in times of sorrow. Love you!
miscarriage is not easy but it prepares you for even worse things in life and you are correct God will not put us thru anything we can not handle, but at that time it feels like the world is ending. its important that everyone has their own way of dealing also.
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